Sexy Med Talk

Ladies check out this application: MeddiApp It allows you to monitor your fertility during the month. This might be a good resource for you ladies using the rhythm method as your primary birth control method or for those of you trying to get pregnant. 

Until next time, Have Sex, Be Happy, Be Healthy.

I’ve recently had the pleasure of meeting and sharing ideas with Michael Friedman. He is an exceptional person and a keenly active figure in HIV advocacy and LGBT rights. He is a leader in this field and active in many other important aspects of human and sexual equality and rights, which he promotes. SexyMedTalk is so happy to have another strong pro-equality warrior as a part of our community. Welcome to our mix Michael! Here is his latest article:

http://michaellorinfriedman.com/queer-harm-reduction-vs-prevention-inc/

Until next time, Have Sex, be Happy, be Healthy. 

Our Body is a Plant not a Machine by

Katrina Ebanks

Being the vitamin addict that I am, my reality was shatered this morning in nutrition class when my professor assured me that taking extra supplements, other than perhaps a daily multivitamin, is pretty much pointless! She, a very well known nutritionist PhD, highly regarded scientist and whole food activist, talked about how there have not been any conclusive studies suggesting that taking extra vitamins, unless in special cases of sickness, desease or addiction, is in any way beneficial and in fact over consumption of supplements and minerals can be toxic and cause adverse side effects to the body. She enphasized how eating whole, unprossed foods, of all colors is indeed the best way to get all the vitamins and minerals we need. I knew this all to a certain extent, but didn’t realize how easy it is in our “fortified” culture to get TOO MUCH vitamins and minerals and the potential side effec that this can have, For example; taking as low as 200% of the dailyrecomended Iron can block our ability to absorb Zinc. I started to think about slow eating, slow cooking, medicine and slow sex. How in our fast-pased life we yearn for quick fixes for everything including our health. We have become ok with popping some pills unquestioningly in hopes to make us stronger, thinner, happier, fall asleep, have more sex drive, all quick! No doubt that fast medicine saves lives, and there are times where it is important and indeed essential. But our body is a slow chainging organism which can be surprisingly simple to maintain. SLEEP, WHOLE FOODS and EXCERSISE. We all known the drill, yet surprisecingly we rarely practice it, and expect our poor fatigued, undernourished bodies, to work with us, party with us, have good sex with us while maintaining a well balanced and composed attitude about it, see the disconnect? There is NO quick fix for physical and metal health. We’ve come to see our body as a machine and our doctors as a mechanic, and that’s the way we treat it. Relenquising control to the first person who’s credentials “assures” us that they are experts on the situation. I assure you no one knows how to nurish and feed your body better than YOU!. Baby you were born that way! So cut out all the marketing noise, and listen closely to what your body needs, and SLOW The F.,$@& down! where are you going anyway? Until next time, Have Sex, be Happy, be Healthy.

http://www.whitehouse.gov/the-press-office/2012/03/30/presidential-memorandum-establishing-working-group-intersection-hivaids-

1- We all want to be heard.

2- We all want to trust and be trusted.

3- We don’t want to be judged.

4- We all want to be understood.

5-We all want to be respected.

This blog is meant to be a safe space for people to share their feelings and information on sexuality and reproductive health. This should be a forum to express and communicate with those you love, those you share  bodily fluids with and your counterparts. If there is something you’re a specialist on, or something on your mind you’d like to inquire on or some embarrasing topic you’d like some light shed on, anonymously, please use this blog as your canvas. Just remember all the questions you have others have also. Together we can shed light on all the little dark topics that keep us from health and happiness around our sexuality. Chime in, write a post, if it fits I’ll put it up and you get to be the expert!

Until Next time, Have Sex, Be Healthy, Be Happy

Ladies seriously check yourself! if something feels wrong in your vagina don’t be afraid to stick your fingers in there and investigate. 

I hear of more and more incidents where ladies feel that something is a little wrong in their vaginal area or uterus or all of a sudden there are strange unfamiliar odors emitting from their vaginal area and due to either to neglect, modesty or just blind hope that it will magically go away they don’t start investigating until things get really funky!

Very often menstruating women use tampons and on ocassion (because you can’t feel it once it’s up there) they’ll accidentally put another one in, forgetting there is already one in there or get drunk and forgett it and have sex and oops!!! there is goes, into the deep dark unknown. Lucky for you the vaginal canal is not an endless tube and if there is something stuck up there you can find it with a little diligence.

Often times when you go to your gynecologist for a routine annual  exam or STD test you can ask for a speculum to take home. This way you can familiarize yourself with your vagina and cervix by using a mirror. This is a very good way to get intimate with  with your important parts that way if something is off you’ll know immediately and not run the risk of having a tampon, piece of a tampon wrapper etc stuck in there which can lead to a pretty bad infection or Toxic Shock Syndrome if left un-dealth with for long enough.

So, if anything feels or smells a bit different that usual, stick your fingers in there or use a speculum and see what’s up. You can avoid yourself a lot of pain and frustration.

Here is some info on Toxic Shock Syndrome a possible complication due to foreign stuff left in the vagina.

http://www.mayoclinic.com/health/toxic-shock-syndrome/DS00221

http://women.webmd.com/tc/toxic-shock-syndrome-topic-overview

By Amy McMahon

    “If you can’t love yourself, how in the hell are you gonna love somebody else?”
-  Ru Paul

    It takes high self-esteem to be in a healthy relationship.  If you feel like you’re a piece of crap who doesn’t deserve better then that’s what you’re going to get.  Men will respect a woman more who doesn’t bend over backwards to please him.  And a woman notices a man more when he doesn’t fall all over her.  

Manipulation Tactics Decoded:
He says, “I can get hundreds of hot chicks, but I’m with you because I love you.”
What she hears, “There is a line of girls around the block just waiting to take your place so you  better watch out.”

She says,  “I don’t feel comfortable spending the night here without my things.”
What he hears,  “I’m more than just a booty call.  I need a drawer and a toothbrush placed permanently.

She says,  “I’m dressed to nicely to just hang out at home with your boys.”
He hears,  “You need to spend more money on me and take me out in public.”

The asshole is a little more outspoken then the quietly manipulative bitch.  But the message is clear:  They want you to think they are better than you so that they can control you.   Unhealthy relationships are about power play.  The bitch controls her man by showing him how desirable she is.  She can’t waist her time with someone who doesn’t treat her like the princess she wants people to believe she is.  The asshole will control his woman by making it appear that he is the master of the universe and women fall to his feet wherever he goes.  He thinks if he wasn’t with you he could sleep with whomever he wants because he’s so fucking amazing.

In order to fall for these tricks you have to have a low sense of self worth.  In some unfortunate cases the bitch or asshole will tear a perfectly confident person down to a needy little dweeb with no backbone.  Be wary of the ones that everyone wants because you may put in so much effort to compete for them that once you have them you will put up with so much shit they put you through just because “you won.”

Don’t be controlled by a bitch or an asshole.  Being manipulated into falling for love is not true love.  You will be sad and angry all the time and they will break your spirit.  That is a sure thing.  If you can love yourself you will find someone who loves you for exactly who you are and as the love grows you will both grow together. True love is finding someone who supports you and makes you into a better person, not the opposite.      

Anal Sex:  How to Play Healthy

The human anus has many nerve endings and a smooth tight muscular cavity that results in a pleasurable experience for the recipient and giver.  Many people find this topic a bit taboo while others converse about it around the dinner table. While anal experimentation can be an erotic and pleasurable experience things can go wrong, so knowledge of the risks associated with anal sex is always a good idea. The two biggest dangers are infectious diseases and physical damage to the fragile rectal tissue.  

Because of the large amount of blood vessels in the anus this is a particularly susceptible site for an STD infection. Receiving anal sex without protection, while  preferable to many, can lead to some unwanted gifts namely such as HIV, HSV (herpes), warts, chlamydia, gonorrhea, hemorrhoids and syphilis to name a few.      

The key to enjoying anal sex healthily and happily is open communication, LUBE, relaxation, and protection.  For first timers I suggest laying on your side and having your partner gently insert two fingers or a training toy into your anus or slowly lowering yourself onto the penis from above, and don’t forget to breath. The anus unlike the vagina is not self lubricating using a good lubricant generously is key to enjoying this sexual act. It also prevents the likelihood of receiving anal tears and consequently contracting an STI.

Anal sex can quickly turn into an embarrassing messy situation, but not to worry this happens. Some will take preventative measures such as doing enemas before hand, some people use enemas as a part of their routine cleansing.  In fact there are some studies suggesting coffee enemas to be a good way to prevent colon cancer. If using your hand a latex glove or having a cleaning method handy can keep things tidy.  

So now that you know that it’s in the open, have fun with it!  Anal sex is taboo and therefore perceived as naughty.  It may be fun to dress up like a little school girl and use handcuffs for instance, or try fun play toys.  Remember to go slowly and ease into this sex act with patience as one coaxing a shy little kitten out of a hole.   

This is my fav book on the subject:

Anal Pleasure and Health- a guide for men and women- by Jack Morin PH.D 

“absolutely indispensable. I can’t recommend this book strongly enough” Dan Savage.

Thanks so much to Amy M. for your contribution to this article!

Have Sex, be Healthy, be Happy